Monday, 11 December 2017

The steps of insecurity: Comparison, Compensation, Competition, Compulsion, Condemnation, control."     - unknown

 “The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else's highlight reel."  - Steve Furtick

We live in a world where almost everything is faked and almost everyone is fake. The competition is so high, and most times it feels like the world is closing in on you.

We worry what other people think about us, we worry if we’re good-looking enough, we worry that we’re not doing all that we should be, we worry that we’ll fail, we worry that people will find out we’re a fraud. We worry that we’re too fat, worry if she’ll like us, worry if he likes that other girl, worry that we’re not good enough.

There are so many things that trigger insecurity; it could be a part of your body, a scar, the way you see yourself, the kind of people you associate with. Being insecure has absolutely nothing to do with being rich or poor, because there are a lot of poor people with high confidence and wealthy insecure people.

Before you can handle your insecurities, you need to know what triggers it, what makes you feel less of yourself. 

Let's do a little exercise before we proceed with how to handle your insecurities....

* Take out a notepad and write out all the bad things you feel about yourself, your scars, past mistakes, everything that makes you feel lesser than anyone else.

* Write down all the great things you feel about yourself, what you've accomplished, who you've helped along the way, things you want to accomplish, write down everything great going on in your life.

* Now compare the both write ups. How do you feel?

* Burn the notepad with the negative things on it. And keep the notepad with the positive things where you'd see it daily or when ever you feel low.

Some of the things that cause insecurities :

1) Negative self image : when you've been criticized by people over the years, you start to criticize yourself. And you never get to see how amazing you are and the great things you can accomplish because you're stuck with "what will people think?"

2) Self hate : Until you learn to love and appreciate everything about yourself, you'd be stuck comparing yourself with everyone and everything that crosses your path.

3) Fear of failure : a lot of people base their happiness on how they succeed in life. I used to fall in this category until I realized that I'm the source of my happiness and I didn't fail, I just didn't succeed at the moment and I can try again.

How can you handle your insecurities? 

1) Self acceptance : you have to love and accept yourself no matter what. No one will appreciate you if you don't appreciate yourself.

2) Practice non comparison : stop comparing yourself with everyone. We're all going through different life difficulties, but how we handle it determines how strong or weak we are. Don't compare your life with someone else's social media life.

3) Be true to yourself.

"In life, there is always someone out there, who won't like you, for whatever reason, don't let the insecurities in their lives affect yours. " 

                                              - Rashida Rowe 

" No one is perfect. Even the most confident people have insecurities. At some point in our lives, we may feel we lack something. That is reality. We must try to live as per our capability.  "
                           -Anil Sinha
We need to understand that no one is perfect and every day we wake up is a new opportunity to do all we ever want to do in life. 


Wednesday, 29 November 2017

Hey guys!  How are y'all doing?
Has anyone gotten to a stage in their lives where they feel they're just existing but not living? For over 2 months now I've had that feeling and it doesn't seem to be going away so I decided to document 30 things I'd do before I turn 30! By the way, I still have a long time to get to 30 since I just turned 22 this year...  But in all, I plan on living life to its fullest and to stop only existing!

My 30 before 30  list in no particular order... 

1. Travel to 5 African countries ( South Africa, Ghana, Kenya, Benin Republic and Togo).  

2. Move to my own apartment (I won't be able to do most of the things on my list if I'm still living with my parents, curfew is by 7pm in my house no matter your age! Nigerian parents Huh?!) 

3. Get another piercing on my ear : I've been meaning to do this for a while now, can't wait to check it off this list! 

4. Learn a new language : I don't have any language in mind, I just feel I'd be better speaking at least 3 to 4 different languages. 

5. Go hiking! I can't believe I spent half of 2016 in Abuja and I never went hiking. I should go back soon and get this off the list too. 

6. Get a car : I can't  afford one at the moment but well I still have some time to save up for it! Plus I hate public transport and I can't spend all my money on uber. 

7. Go on a trip to Germany /Paris : I've been obsessing over this two countries, and I can't wait to be able to afford a trip to one or both of them ❤

8. Get my masters degree : since I'm done with my bachelor's degree, the next in line is bagging my masters degree. I planned on doing that immediately after college, but I decided to take a while off going to school and learning other life lessons. 

9. Take my footwear brand to the next level : I own a denim footwear brand (@ufashionsfootwears on IG (please check it out) and I can't wait to take it to a higher level). 

10. Go on a cleanse (I always attempt this then fail, I need to get it over with already)! 

11. Get a puppy or two! Or maybe 10!

12. Go to New York! (I really hope to do this one soon) 

13. Start working out at least 5 times a week ( I hate sweating).

14. Stay away from negative vibes.. 

15. Stop procrastinating! (for reals girl get your shit together!) 

16. Attend at least one bloggers brunch (I always plan to attend but for some reason I never do ) 

17. Go to Lagos (I've spent my life in Nigeria, I've travelled to at least 15 states but I've never been to Lagos! Unbelievable!) 

18. Go on road trips! 

19. Learn to bake (well I can make pancakes, chin chin, buns, and that's all lol). 

20. Attend a fashion show (must do ASAP) 

21. Build a stronger religious life!  (I go to church and all, but I need my spiritual life to be on a higher level ASAP). 

22. Eat Amala (now I really need to go to Lagos for this or any Yoruba state!) 

23. Go on a shopping spree (girl is on a budget can't try this at the moment ). 

24. Grow my blog (have loyal readers, make this blog feel like home (can you guys help me accomplish that? Yes?) 

25. Do something spontaneous for once!

26. Become a celebrity (oh yes you read right! I didn't come here just to exist ).

27. Get my COREN certificate (that is become a registered engineer (your girl is a civil engineer yo!) and work with bigger firms or have my own company). 

28. Go on a girls only trip (don't I need girlfriends for this? My best friend has so many personalities though and I have a lot of sisters too!) 

29. Be happy  and give to charity at least once a year.

30. Get married to the love of my life / have 2 or 3 kids (haha before my village people starting hosting meetings on my behalf ). 

Wow! Making this list really made me realize I should start living more, because we only get one chance at life and how we spend it really matters. 

How exciting is your life and what do you do for fun? I'd love to know! Let's communicate in the comments section .


Monday, 20 November 2017

There are several accessories we can live without and there are some we can't do without. Handbags fall in the list of the accessories we can't live without. Especially ladies handbags! Where are we going to put our phones, makeups,  ATM cards, hand moisturizers and many other valuable / non valuable things we always carry around?

In this post, we'd be discussing the 5 types of handbags every lady should own in no particular order :

* The Leather Satchel
* The Backpack
* The Clutch
* The Shoulder Bag
* The Cross-body

* The Leather Satchel 
This is a typical work kinda bag. Since it mostly comes in the medium to large size, it can take almost anything. College students will find this type of bag fit, since they have laptops and handouts/textbooks to work with daily. Photographers,  architects,  cooks,  street style fashionistas and a whole lot of on the move professions will find the leather satchel to be of great use.

*The Backpack 
Oh hello casual! This type of bag isn't the typical handbag,  since it's mostly carried on the back....  But over the years it has become a fashion norm. A lot of ladies carry it when they are casually dressed. Adding this bag to one's collection is so necessary! It's advisable not to get one that's too big, so it doesn't feel like carrying a camel on your back.

* The Clutch 
This is more like a fancy purse, cause you can't get more than your phone and lipstick in it!  But the beautiful thing about this type of bag is it's easy to carry about without breaking your arm. It's mostly carried on the red carpet, to weddings, dinner dates, etc. It's definitely a must have for the ladies.

*The Shoulder Bag 
This kind of handbags are beautiful when they are big, but not too big though if not it looks like something else and just might drag down the shoulder of whoever is carrying it! And we don't want that to happen, do we?
The professional ladies always carry this bag, the bankers, the lawyers, a lot of fashion bloggers own this type of bag. The bag literally takes in everything thrown into it. You can even put a baby in it.........  You didn't read that on my blog!!  But you get the picture, the bag has so much space in it, and it's a must have too!

*The Cross-body 
Just as the name, the bag is mostly crossed over. This bag offers you free body movements, while keeping your necessities closer. It's also chicer than the backpack. The bag always comes with an adjustable strap so you can fit it to whatever length you prefer. It's also advisable to get a small to medium size type, so it doesn't get in your way. Don't go too small and don't go too big so it doesn't overwhelm you....

This is all for now, till the next post!
I hope you enjoyed the post, and I'd love to know what bags you prefer carrying and which is a must in your closet!


Monday, 6 November 2017

You know how you get all prepared, that warm night bath after a long day, maybe a yummy dinner, a movie or two, and now all you can think about is that beauty sleep? But count down to 6-8hrs and you wake up looking like shriek!  With the boogyman​ sitting calmly at the corners of your eyes!

If you missed the previous post click here.

No need to worry, let's have a little discussion on the eye discharge before we proceed on what you can do to prevent it....

Eye discharge, or "sleep" also called "eye boogers" in your eyes, is a combination of mucus, oil, skin cells and other debris(dirt) that accumulates in the corner of your eyes while you sleep. It can be wet and sticky or dry and crusty, depending on how much of the liquid in the discharge has evaporated.

Your eyes produce mucus throughout the day, but a continuous thin film of tears bathes your eyes when you blink, flushing out the rheum (another name for eye boogers) before it hardens in your eyes.

When you're asleep and not blinking, eye discharge collects and forms in the corners of your eyes and sometimes along the lash line, hence the term "sleep in your eyes."

Eye discharge isn't a bad thing, but when it comes out in large quantities and has a yellowish or green color, it could mean you have an eye infection and you should see your doctor immediately.

How do you get rid of eye boogers?
I've tried this for 2 weeks, and the results was tremendous . So I'm sharing with you guys what I discovered. 

I always apply lip balm or Vaseline on my eyelids and under my eyes before I go to sleep, and by morning I have little to no discharge in my eyes. And on nights I don't apply it, the boogyman​ appears .

So it's simple, to prevent the eye discharge, try applying lip balm or Vaseline on your eyelids before you go to sleep.

I hope y'all try this and I'd love to know how it works for you too.

Photo Credit : Google. 


Sunday, 29 October 2017

Hey darlings how have y'all been? If you missed the last post check it here.

Since I decided to go natural hair wise, I've tried using a lot of natural products not just for my hair but my face and body too. And one of the best I encountered 2 months ago was using black soap as a shampoo replacement.

I bought a Zee black soap from the mall, with the intent of using it as a bath soap. While having my bath I decided to wash my hair, unfortunately my shampoo was finished so I decided to use the black soap instead and that was one of the best decisions I've made this year!
It didn't only turn out nice as a bath soap, but it turned out better as a shampoo replacement! I don't think I'd be buying any shampoo in future!

Now to the main purpose of this post, the 3 importance of using black soap as a shampoo replacement :

* Chemical Free : The black soap I use "Zee black soap" contains aloe Vera, honey and shea butter. Every naturalista knows the importance of the ingredients above. Unlike the other shampoos that are filled with chemicals we can barely pronounce and we don't know what side effects they come with, this Zee black soap is handmade. It's made in Africa and cured for 21 days before it can be used.

* Helps with Dandruff : For some reason, I battled having dandruff on my hair and I promise you it was really unpleasant! But for this short period I've used Zee black soap as a shampoo replacement, I've noticed a great difference. I don't know if this happens with using every other black soap, but the one I used really helped relieve the dandruff. There's nothing as embarrassing as having dandruff on one's hair, the constant itching and patches it leaves on the hair is terrible. Probably some shampoo can help with it, but I never saw any that worked for me. I'd really recommend using black soap ( try out any one and see which works best for you) as your shampoo if you battle with dandruff.

* Lather : Maybe this shouldn't be listed here, but have you ever got a shampoo and you empty half of the content on your hair but no lather? Like nothing?! Well,  using black soap as a shampoo replacement is different. Just apply a little with water on your hair, the amount of lather it forms makes washing ones hair so interesting! I don't know about y'all, but I always look forward to hair day!

Not all rosey, anyone who has used any black soap will tell you it has a weird fragrance. Don't let that discourage you from enjoying the many benefits it comes with.

Have you used any black soap as a bath soap or shampoo? How was it and did you enjoy using it? I'd love to know your thoughts on the comment section.


Wednesday, 11 October 2017

Y'all know this saying right?
"Low account balance? Sprinkle coconut oil on it
Boyfriend issues?  Sprinkle coconut oil on him
Lots of Bills?  Sprinkle coconut oil on it"
Cause obviously, coconut oil solves every problem.....  Right?

On this post, I'd be sharing 4 ways you can use coconut oil as a beauty product!

Before I continue, I want to sincerely apologize for leaving the blog for a month, I'm still trying to adjust to working the 9-5, focus on my footwear production and focus on the blog. But I promise, I've found a way to balance it all. Thanks for checking in too.

In no particular order, 4 ways to use coconut oil as a beauty product...

Hair : Every naturalista (natural hair ladies ) will tell you that owning a bottle of coconut oil is an essential. It's one of the many oils we use on our hair to let it breath out and to have its glow too!  You can use coconut oil as a natural way to help your hair grow longer, thicker, and faster. The vitamins and essential fatty acids naturally found in coconut oil nourish the scalp and help to remove sebum build-up from hair follicles without adding any chemicals to your hair!

Moisturizer : I use my own coconut oil mostly for my hair and as a Night Cream for my face. Using it at night is advisable because it keeps your skin hydrating and repairing itself while you sleep. If you're prone to acne or have very oily skin, try adding a few drops to your normal moisturizer instead to amp up hydration without adding too much extra oil. Using it as a night cream comes with its advantages, like I always have this glow in the morning and my skin stays smooth and hydrated ☺.
Lip balm : Coconut oil can also be used as a lip balm, all you have to do is apply when your lips feel chapped. Everyone is trying to stay away from using chemical filled substances on any part of their bodies and I'm pretty sure the lips isn't an exception. Plus, coconut oil keeps your lips smooth and soft and kissable too  .

Sunscreen : Coconut oil has a natural SPF of 4-5 which blocks 75% off UV radiation and contains antioxidants that help protect the skin from harmful radiation from the sun. Natural sunscreen! Obviously that low amount of SPF isn't sufficient for a long day in the sun. Especially when in a country like Nigeria where everywhere is mostly hot and sunny. You can always carry your coconut oil with you and reapply when necessary.

The 4 ways above is mostly how I use my coconut oil as a beauty product, I'd love to know how you use your coconut oil in the comments section.


Thursday, 31 August 2017

I have literally suffered from itchy body after having my bath. For some reason, I didn't find bath time to be interesting anymore. I was always washing my towel, changing my sponge, using disinfectants in my water and what not, I didn't know that everything I was doing was contributing to the itch. Some days after a bath I'd itch for 20-30 minutes before I get comfortable to get on with applying my body lotion and getting dressed.

Then I decided to read more on it and I realized a lot of people had the same problem so I decided to make this post. For over a month now, I've done everything listed and I've even stopped having my bath with a sponge and the itching has totally reduced and I know in time, it'd totally disappear. Plus bathing is now fun for me now.

Aquagenic pruritus || The name is derived from Latin: aquagenic, meaning water-induced, and pruritus, meaning itch.

Causes of Itching After Bathing :
Water: Not drying the skin properly after bathing. Steam exposure without properly drying can have a similar effect.

Heat: Hot water can irritate the skin, dry it excessively and worsen existing inflammation.

Toiletries: using antibacterial soaps irritates the skin.

Scrubbing: Vigorous cleaning by scrubbing with a loofah or similar object can injure and irritate the skin.

Dry skin: Water and soap can dry skin which may only become apparent after bathing.

Skin diseases: Inflammation on diseased skin may be exacerbated by bathing.

Hypersensitivity: Heat and vigorous scrubbing can heighten abnormal skin sensitivity and injure the skin.

Infections: Certain microbes in the water can infect the skin while bathing.

Ways to Prevent Itching :
* Take shorter baths with lukewarm to hot water. Avoid very long or very hot baths. Soaking in a bath tub occasionally may not be a problem but frequent soaks that are long could cause itching.

* Use mild soaps and shampoos. Baby soaps and shampoos are usually the safer option. Antibacterial soaps should be avoided. Always ensure that the soap or shampoo is thoroughly rinsed off. Shower quickly after soaking in a bath tub with foam bath or soap.

* Scrub gently when bathing. Remember that dead skin cells will slough off on its own throughout the day and do not have to be physically removed. Gentle rubbing can suffice in remove surface dirt. Do not try to exfoliate deeply with very rough and hard surfaces.

* Dry the skin thoroughly after bathing.Apart from wiping with a dry towel, also try to air dry the body for a short period before wearing clothes.

I've tried out everything here and I've noticed great changes. You can also try washing your towels twice in a week too. (I'd make a post of the bathing products I use in another post).

I hope this post helps someone out there.
I'd love to know your thoughts, and if you've had any problems with bathing. Let's connect in the comment section.